It's been a while. Okay, like one day and a half. But I haven't made a decent blog. Yesterday was a fun day. I hung out with "the circle." I was driving on the 101, heading towards Angela's house because I thought I was meeting up with them there. It turns out that they were all in Glendale already. So I had to re-route to the 110 to the 5. It was hell for 20 minutes. But I managed to make it. I met up with Anka, Pam, and Jared at the Glendale Galleria area. It was my first time there, from what I remember. I am such a loser. But it was too early to go to salsa, so we walked around. We chilled in Tower Records I believe it was, for a little while. It was fun in there. Okay so when the time arrived, we went to the Stardancer Studio place where the lessons were taking place. Marielle met up with us there. There were so many older people there. We were the youngest there, except there was one little girl probably about 9-10 years old. Oh yeah and there was like a 16-year-old, but still about the same age as us. The girl instructor was very pretty. T'was a shame I could not dance with her. But I'd probably be too nervous and step on her feet. As I awaited the time when the lessons would take place, apprehension and anxiety filled my body. But I was determined to learn. So we formed our rows, in front of the reflections of ourselves, to see our stiff or flailing bodies fill with embarrassment. We learned about 5-6 different things. I struggled at first but then I got the hang of it. Oh yeah! So then we started dancing with partners. I probably danced with all age ranges. From teenage girls to elderly women. Some were stuck-up and some were nice. It was a fun activity. See you next Monday, hopefully. After that we went for a quick run to Starbucks. They went to say hi to Joel. And apply. I went to get some Jamba Juice w/ Pam and we went to get some ice cream with Marielle. After, we said our goodbye to Pam and Marielle. Then Angela, Jared, and I grabbed a quick bite and we went our separate ways home.

As for the day after, it was quite the contrary. Nothing much happened. Just wasting another day of summer. But, however, I finished reading The Kite Runner. That book was incredible. It made me sad, happy, angry, disappointed, and all that jazz. I really enjoyed it.

Okay, now to be exposed. I don't know how many people actually read this, but it doesn't matter anymore. I choose to reveal my thoughts. It's my outlet.

So it barely hits me that it could have been 2 years last Sunday, which is a pretty long time I would say. It made me think about her. But not so much. I just thought about whether she's happier now. From what I see, she seems happier. A lot happier. That's good. But I'm also picking up mixed messages from her. Things that she says, Are they meant for me? It seems that way, and they aren't that positive either. I don't know like since it ended she has said some peculiar things. If she's reading this, I hope she lets me know. I don't even talk to her anymore, even when we're hanging out with the same people, which was only like twice. I guess what we thought would be hopefully a lasting friendship became a falling out. But it worked out for the better. She's happier. I'm happier. We both win, right? But am I really happier?

I would think I am. I finally got to hang out with people I've been wanting to for so long. I've met new people too. But at the end of the night as I lay in bed, I wonder, Is this how you pictured your life to be right now? Honestly, I did not know what life really held for me at this moment. Am I seeking another relationship? Am I trying to escape the loneliness? I think I'm just thinking too much. But that's what happens when you're staring at the ceiling with nothing to do. I'm indecisive. I can't decide what I want right now. And the fact that time is moving way too fast isn't helping. From what I perceived to be an easy-going time is turning into a monster. And I'm peering into its mouth, waiting to swallow me whole. Will someone save me? Or will I have to save myself? I'm leaning towards the latter. I need to figure out my life and I need to do it now. It's time to stop my laziness and start making a name for myself. I feel like I've really changed, and it's time to prove to myself I've changed for the better.

Completely off the subject, I finally talked to Sarah again after a day and a half? Yeah, it's not that long, but it seemed forever since we usually pull all-nighters every day. But it seems those days are over. But it's okay. Just 5-10 minutes is enough. But that never seems to be the case. It ends up being like 30 minutes or something, which isn't a bad thing in some cases. I've barely started talking to her like last month, and we've really talked to each other like two-three weeks ago? But it feels like I've known her longer. I feel a good friendship coming, and I hope it lasts. I'll make sure of it. I just wished there were a lot more people I could feel the same way, where I could talk endlessly about anything. There are some people I would think. But sometimes, you don't know if they really do feel the same way about your friendship the way you do.

Go slowly, my lovely moon, go slowly